The First and Only Time I Fell in Love

I can't thank you enough for everything you've done in a very short time. I don't know how to thank you for being such a good boyfriend to me. You never fail to make me smile everyday. I'm not exaggerating things since you came into my life again. It's the truth, I'm so happy every single day. And this means so much to me. Having you here in my heart, making me the luckiest girl on the planet, is a dream come true and an answered prayer. In case you don't know how much this means to me, let me tell you two things...

First, I've been telling this a lot of times, but this is actually the first time it felt so true, that I'm undoubtedly in love with a man who's more in love with me. This is the first time I'm getting goose bumps and butterflies in my stomach at the same time while telling people how much I love you. I know you're feeling the same, and everything feels like the first and the only time you fell in love, right?

Second, I've heard the same words before, but everything you say now sounds so new, like they're repeating every single day, and I'm feeling the same happiness I felt the first time I heard it. I've heard I love you perhaps a thousand times, but yours is so different. It's my ultimate favorite music of all time, that I can listen to your I love you's every second without getting tired. And everything else you say, it's just so magical. Everything feels like the first time -- everyday!

What makes everything you do more magical is how it makes me more happier today than yesterday. And I really feel it's going to be like that till we get old. So by the time we're 90s, I'm gonna be a zillion times happier than today. :)

I hope you also feel how much I love you, the same way I feel loved by you. Your love is so sweet and strong at the same time, that you're both my weakness and strength. You've been turning my world upside down, but it's not the bad love people usually get from the wrong people. I know I'm with the right person now, and we're both getting the good love we deserve, because everything feels so right. I can't further explain how I exactly feel about this, but one thing's for sure...

I'm going to love you till we both get wrinkles and white hair. I'll still tell you you're handsome despite poor eyesight due to old age. I'm going to stand by your side despite the weakness of my bones. My heart will beat only for you till it stops beating. I was born to love you, and I'm going to die loving you.

I love you so much baby. Thank you for not making me cry for so much pain.

Side by Side

I couldn’t put my happiness into words; perhaps not now that I’m still on a high. We were just side by side a few minutes ago, and now we’re on our own again. I miss him so much already. As I look at him pacing away from me, my heart becomes heavy. He is my everything. For the moment, I am left with nothing, and all I ever want is to be beside him as long as I live.

Only You

Two days ago, we celebrated our first monthsary since we got back together. Indeed, the days are passing by so quickly that I didn’t realize we’ve reached our first month. I wanted to write about what happened that night, but I was too tired to stare at a bright laptop screen and type. But today’s a great day since I have nothing to do, and I thought this is a great time to write down everything that happened two days ago. So here it goes.

It’s been a month, and I’m finally believing it’s all happening. That we’re on again, and it feels so much different now. In terms of how we express our love to each other, nothing has changed. But then there’s something about us that completely changed, and it feels so good that I don’t care how it happened. I just wanted it to continue and last forever. Then I realized, we’ve grown up when we’re apart, and that’s how our relationship worked out. I don’t know how to say this; it’s like we broke up and then we thought we’re trying to be good for someone else. But it’s not the real reason why we’re doing what we’re doing that time we were separated. It’s not God’s will that we changed because of someone else. It’s His plan to bring us people we can learn from, and get back together again because we’re finally mature to continue this relationship. Do you get my point? We needed other people—apart from ourselves—to realize that we’re doing it wrong.

And that’s none of our business now. Times like these make me try to know what’s going on in full details; but it’s beyond my capacity to know absolutely everything. I can’t, and I never will. God makes things happen, and I should just let Him be. But do you understand what I’m trying to express? I’m not saying that it’s what exactly happened; but I’m trying to make ourselves feel good about everything. I just thought it’s my job to tell you how glad I am that of all the people I met and the plans I made for myself, we still ended up with each other. Of the millions of people in the world, I would have met thousands of them. Hundreds of them are men, and I could have fallen in love with a few of them. But it was always you. Only you. Can you imagine how big the world is, and I only have you? I even had you twice. Now, I can’t imagine the world without you despite the many people I can have. That’s ultimately awesome; God is truly great.

To get away from such heavy thoughts up there, I want you to know that these letters are not to impress youor make you feel loved. I don’t sugar coat when I write.I don’t write 100% positive letters all the time. This is to let you know that I’m more honest when I write—not that I’m less honest in person. I just don’t get to say these things because I’m not verbose about it. When it comes to love, it’s better that I write it down, and I believe that you know it very well. I’m speechless more often; my mind goes blank when I should be responding. It only goes to work again when I’m alone and in front of the laptop. So, you’re lucky you are the receiver of my sincere letters. More than that, I’m luckier that I get to write such letters because you drive me crazy about you.

Talking about craziness, I admit that after all this time, I’m still deeply in love with you. I’m physically attracted to you; I’m emotionally attached to you; and I’m mentally connected to you. I don’t literally go crazy anymore, like I can’t be controlled. But I still get that feeling that I’m addicted to you (in a very mature manner). Addicted, as in I think about you all the time; I’m highly excited hours before we meet; my cheeks are flaming red when we’re talking over the phone; and (this time I’m uncontrollable) I can’t help myself but hug you tightly and hold your hands infinitely till we go home. I miss you every day. I miss you even when you’re around. I miss your entire presence and the things I love about you:

1.  Your brown eyes. They’re the finest eyes I’ve looked into.
2.  How simple you are. The way you dress, walkand talk is perfect enough. You’re not trying to be someone else because you are being you;
3. And that’s the third thing I love about you—you are true to yourself.
4. How responsible and disciplined you are.
5. Your humility.
6.  Being a gentleman.
7. Your respect in women.
8.  Your belief in God(and it shows!).
9. Your efforts.
10. And all the things you’re willing to do for me.

So….. I finally came to that part where I can’t add anything else. Of course, there’ll be more of this any time soon.

I’m going to end this with an endless thanks to you, my love. You are my favorite person now and then. Keep making me happy. Don’t stop inspiring me.  Love me even more each day. Stay with me for the rest of your life. Marry me. Let me be the last woman to capture your heart. Just let me love you forever. I’ll do everything to let you know that I’m only yours and I love you so much. You’re my everything, my whole world, and my whole life. You have my heart. Don’t break it, baby. I won’t break yours. I’ll make you stay forever with me. Together we’ll survive this tough life because I’ll never leave you. You’re mine, okay? I love you!